Fears & Hopes

To my dear SR,
     I decided I wanted to write down the things about your being in the Navy that scare me and that make me excited.  First off, I want to be clear that no matter what my fears are, I am behind you 100% and I will support you.  However, I am only human and a woman and there are so many unknowns that creep into my thoughts, that I wanted to write them down if only to make it more clear to myself.

My Fears

• You will change into someone I don't know and don't understand
• We will change into a couple that is distant and uncommunicative
• Being in the Navy will take up so much of your time that I will never get quality time with you
• Losing quality time and communication with you will cause me to be uncontrollably clingy and drive you away
• You will realize how many strong, amazing, smart, and beautiful women (Sailors and otherwise) you are surrounded by every day and realize how weak I am in comparison
• You will rather travel than be with me
• I'll lose you completely

My Hopes

• You will change into someone who is more capable of communication and letting himself feel deeper emotions
• We will change into a couple that is distant in space only and that communicates better than we ever did before
• Being in the Navy will take up a lot of your time, but we both will learn to make the most of the time we have and will treasure it all the more
• I will be able to stay strong and support you every step of the way while being able to be independent
• You will realize how many strong, amazing, smart, and beautiful women you are surrounded by every day but you will still think I'm the one for you and you will still choose me
• You will love traveling but will always wish I could be there with you if I can't and will enjoy the time at home with me when we have it
• We will fall deeper in love through the trials and the tribulations and maybe even I will end up being your "Navy wife" instead of your "Navy girlfriend"

   It helps to me make this lists because I can organize my thought and I can see how they relate to each other.  Some of these things I can control and others I cannot.  No matter what, I am so excited to see where these next few months or years take us, take me, take you.  You are an a amazing man already, and I can only hope that somehow this experience will make us both better people and a better couple.  I still miss you, my SR, as I do every day and every night.   

         I love you,

                Your Girl

Image from: http://www.emotionalcompetency.com/hope.htm

"Hope and fear are inseparable.  There is no hope without fear, nor any fear without hope." ~Francois de la Rochefoucauld